How laughter was saved

Alright I really have done it this time, I really really did it. I made a few people laugh. I am both pleased and a bit confused. Pleased, because I made people laugh. Confused, because I really am not that funny.


Since I first wrote the column, I have heard from several people who have said I needed to share more of the things that I do to make people laugh out loud. I figured what the heck I will share some and hope I make people laugh again. I hope, is the key words here.

There was an event way back in the mid 1500’s that changed the way people feel about laughing. People who lived back then lost all ability to laugh because of the long history of being told what funny really is. The court jesters were about as boring as reading the New York Times on a good day. Happiness only came from a good chicken and a lousy pickled turnip.

Then one foggy December 3rd eve, a revival on happiness came about. Sir Emo Rubik invented a cube that revolutionalized happiness. People of all ages learned that there was more to life than turnips, carrots and farming. They were taught that this magic cube that “puzzled” the masses was indeed the way to happiness.

With this magic cube, that twisted and turned where each of the six faces is covered by 9 stickers, among six solid colors (traditionally white, red, blue, orange, green, and yellow). A pivot mechanism enables each face to turn independently, thus mixing up the colors. For the puzzle to be solved, each face must be a solid color.

Well the masses at first could not understand how to solve Emo’s little colorful cube and decided that there was only one person who could possibly solve this great unknown . Two villagers from the mountains of London’s east side named Dave and Tim gathered all the villagers whose puzzlement over the new cubes were building with each minute from Big Ben.

With an almost unanimous vote, it was decided that the cube would need to be brought to the most famous puzzle solver of the day, Dr Cris Chasse. What he was a doctor of has never been truly known, however most people say, as legend has it, that he was not just the doctor of love in the early days, but also a doctor of all the sciences then known to man.

When Dave and Tim reached the famous Chasse, he was working on making a candle that really was not a candle at all. It was a strange type of bulb that actually light up a room far better than any candle they had ever seen (more on that in another column). Dave handed the good doctor the cube and explained the rules as best he could. Within sixty some odd seconds, Chasse put all the colors in order and thus completed the puzzle. The glee that Dave and Tim had was undeniable. Tim and Dave thanked the extremely talented Dr. after learning the secret to solving the puzzle and raced back to the village.

In front of all the village, Dave and Tim solved the puzzle in front of all of the village. Laughter, smiles and dancing erupted spontaneously. Most of the villagers could not solve the puzzle but it really did not matter at all. What mattered most was that laughter and smiles had returned in abundance. The biggest baby boom of the century happened that next year as people were uncontrollably happy again. Men, woman, and children, once again learned how to be themselves and unleashed that little green happy person inside. That happy person resides in all of us and it doesn’t take Emo’s famous cube to unleash it.

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Cutting costs at the risk of our health

If you wind up in the hospital, there’s a good chance you’ll be making a return trip. About 20% of Medicare patients are readmitted within a month or so of discharge.


Now the feds are looking to drive down readmissions by penalizing hospitals with high rates. The idea is to give hospitals a financial incentive to keep patients out of the hospital, which could in turn lower overall health costs.

So many hospitals may soon be following the lead of those facilities that have been making a concerted effort to keep people from coming back. The key takeaway: To drive down readmission rates, hospitals have to follow their patients home and get involved in their lives in the outside world.

Here is the tale of a hospital in western Massachusetts that’s been pushing for a while to reduce readmissions for patients with heart failure, a chronic condition where the heart isn’t pumping as well as it needs to. The hospital’s efforts range from installing high-tech monitors in patients’ homes to telling patients to lay off the hot dogs at Fourth of July picnics, because the high sodium content could cause problems.

Heart failure is a key condition to watch in the readmission story for a few reasons.

Readmission rates are particularly high for heart failure patients — about one in four is readmitted in 30 days.

Heart failure patients often have multiple, chronic conditions, so they’re indicative of the type of complex patient that often struggles in our fragmented health-care system. They often see multiple specialists who may not be aware of all the different drugs the patient is taking, and it may be difficult for the patient to coordinate his or her own care.

What’s more, certain signs — such as sudden weight gain — can be a sign of imminent trouble, and quick, relatively simple interventions can prevent re-hopsitalization. The trick is some combination of teaching the patients to care for themselves, and working to take better care of them when they’re out of the hospital — the two big issues at the core of driving down readmission rates for a wide range of patients.

What does this all mean to us as a patient? No one like to be sick and we certainly do not want to go back to the hospital, but most of the time recent studies show that people leave the hospital way too early. Americans do not eat well and do not get the proper exercise in their daily routine. We can do anything if we put our mind’s to it, but sometimes our bodies just do not co-operate.

One can only hope that during the senate healthcare debate, our leaders will understand that we all will get sick one time or another and if we pay our insurance premiums the companies should treat us fairly.


Please feel free to post a comment after each and every column.

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Please forward to your friends and colleagues to enjoy. The more readers I have, the more money that is raised for the Dana Farber Cancer Institute.


E-mail: drcchasse@verizon.net

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I think I can make you laugh

I have always thought that I could be a standup comic. While I might look funny, I have at times made people laugh. Making people laugh is one of the things that make me feel like I have a purpose on this earth. If I could just make it a living then it would be purposeful. Now that was a bit witty, don’t you think?


I have written that the belly laugh is the best thing on earth. I cannot remember a joke for the life of me. Most of the jokes that I know are strictly locker room quality. None of the one’s I know can be told at a nursing home. Not that I have visited a nursing home lately. Maybe I could learn how to sing. Then again, I spent all of the money that my parents gave me for singing lessons on baseball cards.

Jim Carey uses his body to make people laugh. His expressions are priceless. I have nothing like that in my repertoire. In fact I have no real skill in this area at all. I wish it was that easy to make someone laugh.

Dave Barry is a great comedy columnist. I have read some of my columns recently and as hard as I have tried writing about sharks and pillows are not exactly funny stuff as Johnny Carson would say. What is funny to me is when I write something that I believe might gain a laugh or two does it really make someone laugh. When I write a column with hopes of making someone laugh, do people really enjoy it? I would bet my life they do. Well maybe not my life, more like a buck. My life is too precious to bet my life on. Maybe the dollar is too much too.

I do tell a pretty good story now and then I have been told. I like the shock factor in every story I tell. I say things that should never come out of my mouth. Probably infantile, but hey it works. I am certain that I will not stop doing.

I cannot act I know that. I tried a few times with little or no success, mostly no success. I cannot live in a world of make believe, I really can’t. Maybe I already do believing that I can entertain.

I say cannot so many times lately maybe I have just become the male version of Debbie downer. That is not funny now is it? It is more like a bad case of hemorrhoids? Ok, maybe that is too much information to share in this column, but it is what it is.

I certainly try the analogy game every once in awhile. The dictionary states, an analogy is the similarity in some respects between things that are otherwise dissimilar. A few of my favorites;

She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.


The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.


McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.


From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and “Jeopardy” comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.)

Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.


Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.


Instant classics, if I do not say so myself. Maybe I can never have the comic genius of a Richard Pryor, but do you really have to? Bringing a smile is what it really is all about.


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Please forward to your friends and colleagues to enjoy. The more readers I have, the more money that is raised for the Dana Farber Cancer Institute.

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Weekly Thought Bonanza November 30th

On Sunday/Monday, I produce a column called “The Weekly Thought Bonanza”. The column is based on all of the random thoughts that run through my head all week, and trust me there are a plethora of them. I will try to share as many of these thoughts as I can, so each one of my readers can think just a little bit extra over the coming week. After my short holiday break the “Bonanza is back.


Christmas music before December 1st makes no sense to me. It is so nice to just enjoy Thanksgiving first.

Tiger Woods is human after all. Good luck Tiger, cleaning up that mess my friend.

My Christmas tree is up before December first by the way. With an eight month old and a baby on the way, I just had to.

Somali Pirates have hijacked another oil tanker this week. When will we learn that this has to be stopped immediately? Goes to show you the United Nations cannot do a thing. Once again Great Britain and the United States have to play the world policeman.

Concussions in the NFL have to be dealt with more strictly. The league makes billions in revenue so there are no excuses. Protect the players first. Football might just become too dangerous to play.

ESPN has incredibly hilarious commercials when their on air talent and athletes mix. You cannot change the channel when they come on. The new ‘Shaqtus” commercial is an instant classic. Good commercials are better than any television show to me.

Just a thought her, but how many of you think that there is no way this flu season will ever end? There are more people out sick and school days missed than I can ever remember. Piece of advice, try the Zinc and Vitamin C diet.

Reports of Chinese children being kidnapped and sold in U.S. has some worried orphans they adopted weren't really orphans, others fearing crackdowns might backfire on kids with medical problems.

Whatever happened to good old fashion family fun entertainment? Does anyone play games like Monopoly or Life?

I know that Friday after Thanksgiving is a big shopping day, but to line up at 3 am is not my idea of a fun day. If I have to get up at 3 am it is to feed the baby.

Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat and my electric bill is about to go through the roof with all of the lights I have up. Clark Griswold Chasse is the name and hanging lights is not what I wanted to be doing in 50 mph wind this weekend.

Blue Ray DVD’s are absolutely awesome to watch. Having to update the software is not awesome at all.

I am glad the city of New Orleans is having a revival and with their undefeated football team the city has a sense of pride. Tuning on the New England Patriots is not fun for a fan of the Pats.

The Weekly Thought Bonanza thought of the week; What do you get someone for Christmas that has everything? I need ideas.

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What really is Thanksgiving?

Thanksgiving is a North American harvest festival. When the Pilgrims (a Puritan sect) arrived in America to start a new life here, they set up colonies, practiced their religion freely, and farmed their new land. They celebrated Thanksgiving as an act of gratitude to God for their new life and freedoms.

In the United States, Thanksgiving is celebrated as a legal one-day holiday every year on the fourth Thursday of November. When the Pilgrims first came to Plymouth Plantation, the Native American tribes like that of Wampanoag taught them how to yield crops for a living.

The earliest authenticated celebration was the one in September 1565, in Florida. The Native Americans were deeply pious, and the tradition is carried through even today.

European farmers observed Thanksgiving for a good harvest. They stuffed a goat's horn with the harvested grains symbolically known as cornucopia or the Horn of Plenty. This ritual was carried on when they arrived in Canada.

Thanksgiving is celebrated on the second Monday of October every year in Canada. It dates back to Martin Frobisher, who celebrated it in 1578 out of appreciation for having survived his journey trying to find a northern passage to the Orient.

Hence, the former celebrated Thanksgiving as a prayer for a good harvest. Since 1947, The National Turkey Federation gives the President of the country one live and two dressed turkeys as gift. This ritual is known as the National Thanksgiving Turkey Presentation.

Knowing why Thanksgiving started is so different than what it is and means today. We do not celebrate the harvest or cheer a journey anymore. We celebrate the family. We celebrate friends and we celebrate the blessings that we have.

The best thing to me about Thanksgiving is certainly not the shopping the next day, called Black Friday. Thanksgiving is sharing a meal, a laugh, a story, and a smile. Family and friends being together for a day of watching football and eating till we are stuffed like the turkey. That certainly brings happiness to my family.

Americans can and should use this day not just as a day of happiness but also as a day of reflection. Think deeply about what you have and thank all of the people in your life that makes you appreciate not only what you have, but what is yet to come.


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Dodd and Reid might be ex-Senators in 2010

Two Senate leaders trying to steer a pair of President Barack Obama's high-stakes initiatives through Congress are being dogged by re-election worries, and it's not clear whether their legislative prominence will help or hurt them.


Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., and Sen. Chris Dodd, D-Conn., are trailing in early polls, and Republicans are eager to topple them in next year's elections.

They also are central players in two of the most ambitious and hotly contested agenda items in decades. Reid is scratching and clawing to find enough Senate votes to overhaul the nation's health care system. And Dodd, as chairman of the banking committee, is pushing a massive bill to re-regulate the nation's financial institutions following the mortgage meltdown and economic crisis.

Policy-making in Congress has long mixed with rawboned politics. But seldom does the focus fall so clearly on two powerful lawmakers who, despite their seniority and influence, are in real danger of being voted out of office.

Obama is well aware that two of his top priorities are being shepherded by Democratic senators who badly need to have home-state voters view them more favorably. Administration aides say the president is responding in two ways: Helping Reid and Dodd raise early campaign money; and, especially with Dodd, giving them leeway to deviate from administration proposals for now, knowing there is time to bend the bills more to Obama's liking before final votes occur.

Obama adviser David Axelrod said the president strongly admires Reid and Dodd, and believes they best serve their home-state constituents by being national leaders on big issues such as health care and financial oversight.

Democrats are doing their best to help Dodd, a senator's son who joined the Senate himself in 1981. They let him preside over the chamber when a crucial health care vote was taken Saturday night, and they've given him other chances to go before TV cameras during recent events related to health care and finances.

Advocacy groups are carefully watching Reid and Dodd for signs of shaping the bills to help their re-election campaigns. Some claim to see such evidence, while others say it would be difficult for either senator to manipulate the massive, complex legislation in ways to appeal to ordinary voters.

In Dodd's case, business groups say his financial regulation bill has more populist features than do Obama's proposals and a House version. For example, Dodd would strip the Federal Reserve of its power to regulate banks, and consolidate banking oversight under one regulatory agency rather than several. Some have accused him of "Fed-bashing."

Dodd called the comments mystifying, saying he has been consistent on consumer issues for years.

A recent Quinnipiac poll in Connecticut found Dodd trailing potential GOP challenger Rob Simmons, a former House member, 49 percent to 38 percent. A lesser-known Republican also led Dodd in a hypothetical matchup.

Quinnipiac poll director Doug Schwartz said Dodd hurt himself with state voters by moving to Iowa during his unsuccessful bid for the 2008 presidential nomination, and by receiving preferential treatment in obtaining mortgage loans. Worst of all, Schwartz said, was Dodd's involvement in a bill that protected bonuses for executives at insurance giant AIG, which proved deeply unpopular.

In a similar vein, many Nevada voters seem to have grown tired of Reid after 23 years in the Senate. A poll commissioned by the Las Vegas Review-Journal found him 10 percentage points behind Nevada GOP chairwoman Sue Lowden, one of several Republicans vying to oppose him next year. Half of Nevada's voters had an unfavorable view of Reid.

Reid's friends fear echoes of Tom Daschle, the Senate Democratic leader who lost a 2004 re-election bid in South Dakota amid claims that he showed more allegiance to a national, liberal-leaning agenda than to his conservative state.



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Please forward to your friends and colleagues to enjoy. The more readers I have, the more money that is raised for the Dana Farber Cancer Institute.



E-mail: drcrischasse@verizon.net

Voice 206-350-6437