Weekly Thought Bonanza Sept 12/13

On Sunday, I produce a column called “The Weekly Thought Bonanza”. The premise of this column is about the random thoughts that run through my head all week and trust me there are a plethora of them. I will try to share as many of these thoughts as I can so each one of my readers can think just a little bit extra over the weekend.

Not that I drank it very often before, but I drink soda very rarely as I am a diabetic and I can only drink diet soda. American’s consume an average of twenty two teaspoons of sugar a day and diet soda is not an alternative to cutting back. There is absolutely no nutritional value in it and there is always an aftertaste to diet soda drinks. Here is a major warning, do not try the diet green tea ginger ale ever. You will thank me over and over again.

Watching a baby sleep is absolutely priceless. Trying to get an angry baby to sleep might be worse than a trip to your dentist for a root canal.

I started to learn how to bake pies over the last few months. There is absolutely nothing better than eating a big meal while you are watching football on a Sunday then finishing it off with a delicious freshly baked pie. This is one time in life that you do not mind all of the practice in the search for perfection.

Rainy Saturday’s in the fall were meant for college football. Sunny days in the fall were meant for raking leaves and staking wood. Guess which one guy’s pray for in the fall.

Our fury canine friends have no problem going through the trash to find a snack or even eating their own poop. My question is, why are there so many flavors of dog food? If you think about it long and hard it does not make a whole lot of sense.

Have you ever tried any of those As Seen on TV products? I must admit, I do try them because they always look like they will be a winner and I am a gadget guy. I need to learn my lesson sooner rather than later because they never work like they do when you watch them on the infomercial. I still like to try them though.

Michael Jordan was the best basketball player I have ever seen without a debate.

What is everyone’s new fascination with vampires? I for one have never been impressed.

President Obama addressed schools this past week and there was an uproar by several people protesting the President’s address. Why? Whether you approve of his politics or not he is still the President of the United States. I commend the President for giving a pep talk to our school age children.

Congratulations go out to Diane Sawyer who is replacing Charles Gibson on the anchor desk at ABC World News Tonight. Sawyer deserves the job after all that she has done over at ABC. She brought Good Morning America back from the dead and will revitalize World News Tonight.

Can you still win father of the year award after you lock your child in the car? Whose idea was it to put automatic door locks on Grand Cherokee’s.

Feel good story of the week. Dr. Denton Lotz gave his first church sermon at the age of seventy yesterday. He has seventy years of experience behind each sermon I say.

The “Weekly Thought Bonanza” thought of the week. Caster Semenya, an 800 meter runner for South Africa, is having her gender questioned because of her manly looks and deep voice. Her is a solution to the problem. Have a doctor go in and give her a physical exam. If she has male organs she is not a she, end of debate.

For all who know me 9/11 is a very tough day for me every year. I actually wrote a column a few weeks ago “Have We Forgotten”. (http://drcrischasse.blogspot.com/2009/08/have-we-forgotten.html). If you have not read it please do and you will understand how this year was a lot tougher than most.

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Football not Baseball is America's Pastime

Baseball is called America’s past time since the early twentieth century; however football is now America’s real favorite pastime. The opening of the football season begins tonight as the Steelers of Pittsburg battle the Titans of Tennessee. Even though I love my beloved Yankees, they still do not compare to my New England Patriots.

The television ratings for tonight’s Steeler versus Titan matchup that will draw about a 15.1 overnight share., each overnight rating point represents about 735,000 TV homes, would beat the opening night game of the baseball season by forty percent. Baseball drew an eight point two share when they opened back in April. Last year’s Super Bowl rating drew a 46 overnight share, while the World Series only averaged an 18 share. It is obvious that more people are watching football than baseball by a wide margin.

I thought deeply about how football is such a wildly popular sport and came up with a few thoughts. If there is a game that ritualizes the American experience it is football. For three hours both men and women can enjoy sanctioned warfare away from decorum, forced politeness, and feminization of everyday life. Two teams defend their territory and violently tackle those who would encroach. Back and forth they struggle towards a goal; but the actual, underlying reason behind the game is to gain territory. In ten-yard increments the scoring team pushes while the scored-upon team gives ground in hopes of a stalemate and punt.


Professional football teams, like aggressive, marauding tribes of history, have their distinctive colors and "totems," usually animals (Bears, Lions, Eagles, Jaguars, etc.). Football "totems" (i.e., NFL licensed clothing, etc.) give our fans a sense of belonging to a unique community and "we" versus "them." The thrilling sight of our big bruisers running from the sidelines at the beginning of the game with overflowing testosterone, aggression, and adulation of screaming fans and buxom, jumping cheerleaders all come together in what has to be one of the best feelings of community and camaraderie ever.


With its relatively short season and only one game per week, fans feel a sense of urgency, knowing that a victory (or, alas, a defeat) must sustain (or discourage them) for the whole of the next week. The football regular season is only 16 weeks. Every game is important, even to winning teams vying for home-field advantage in the post season playoffs.


Football also has a place in the American historical psyche. The story of American expansion through territory defended by Native Americans, French, Spanish, and later Mexicans can be symbolized by our love of football. The annexation of Texas and the subsequent Mexican-
American war was an egregious example of "off sides," which because of the lack of instant replay, Americans won. The annexation of California just before the 1849 gold strike was an example of the "Hail Mary" pass. The U.S. Civil war was an example of the Confederates playing a "prevent" defense in hopes that the clock would run out of the North. The North won with its overwhelming front line strength.


Finally, Americans love football for its constant renewal of hope and optimism. Although this hope ebbs with the ticking of a game clock, it is renewed with each bursting forth of the team from the sideline, even if the team is short on talent during a losing season. Despite the other team's superiority in gaining territory, there is always a chance, a hope, that the underdog can get away with an off-sides or pulling off a "Hail Mary" pass.

Just like in the movie The Little Giants, it only takes just one time to become a hero. A winless team can beat the best team in football and make their whole season for the team and fans alike. You cannot have that experience in baseball as there is so many games bad teams beat good teams all of the time.

Here is my top ten reasons football is better than baseball:


1) Rain delays-followed by rainouts.

2) Football games in September are important for H.S., NCAA, and NFL teams. Baseball games mean nothing in April, May, June, July, and August.

3) Every football field is 100 yards long which means that there's no such thing as a Chinese touchdown. A home run to left field at Fenway would be an out in Yankee Stadium.

4) You can't intentionally walk Tom Brady, Lawrence Taylor or Jim Brown.

5) The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders compared to Wally The Green Monster

6) Quarterbacks solidify their reputations by how they play in the fourth quarter. Starting pitchers make way for relief pitchers when the going gets tough.

7) Football coaches don't wear uniforms. Can you imagine Bill Belichick or Tom Landry coaching from the sideline while wearing a full uniform with pads, cleats and a helmet?

8) Some people believe that the 1927 Yankees were the best team of all time and that they could even beat some of the best teams in recent history. Could the same argument be made that the 1934 Chicago Bears would beat the 2004 Patriots? No way, never!

9) Baseball players go on the disabled list for minor injuries such as: pulled hamstrings, sore
elbows, and stiff backs. John Elway played his entire career without an MCL, Jack Youngblood played in the 1980 playoffs with a broken leg, and Ronnie Lott cut the tip of his pinkie finger so that he could continue playing the season.

and finally...

10) Our Pop Warner teams would beat the tar out of Taiwan's, Japan's, or any other country's youth football team.

Football, America’s Game
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Why has Jaws come to Life?

In Chatham, Massachusetts there have been at least ten sightings of great white sharks over the past week. Beaches have been closed over the Labor Day weekend as these sharks have been seen only seventy yards from the shoreline. In nineteen seventy five a movie named Jaws, directed by Steven Spielberg, scared the living the wits out of me. My days of swimming at Cape Cod beaches just might be over.

A total of five great white sharks have now been electronically tagged off Cape Cod, allowing experts to track their movements. The state office of Energy and Environmental Affairs says three more sharks were tagged on Tuesday off Monomy Island, near Chatham. Agency spokesman, Kate Plourd, says one of the sharks was estimated to be 15 feet long. The others were estimated to be 10 to 12 feet and nine feet in length, respectively.

White sharks are predatory animals that begin life by feeding on fish, rays, and other sharks, and as they grow, switch to feeding on marine mammals and scavenging on large animal carcasses. Their first mammalian prey is usually the small harbor seal; but as the sharks increase in size, they become large enough to eat sea lions, elephant seals, and small toothed whales. Attack strategy consists of a swift, surprise attack from below, inflicting a large, potentially fatal bite. The pinniped often dies from massive trauma or blood loss; but the bites may be superficial or misplaced on the body, allowing the seal to escape and survive the attacks with their scars as witness. Large white sharks will also scavenge on the carcasses of whale sharks, and on the fat-rich blubber layer of dead whales. They will occasionally feed on sea turtles and sea otters, and are known to attack, but not eat, humans.

So they only attack humans and not just eat us. Great! Nothing like getting bit by a shark I always say. Only hurts as bad as a mosquito bite, right?

Experts say the Great White Shark has entered the shores of Cape Cod because the seal population is exploding there. The Great White Shark see’s seal on the menu and goes out for dinner.

Sharks are not the only species on earth that people feel are useless. Wolves, bears, and cougars also do not serve a purpose that people can see. They can hurt people and people's livestock without provocation. On the other hand, without these predators to prey on animals; these animals can run wild, overpopulate and eat all the food items. They also can have a population crash which will lead to disease and who knows what else....oh, did I mention that since all the deer, elk, etc. are overpopulated our livestock now has little too little to eat. On top of that, all the prey animals are now destroying our crops because they are reproducing with nothing to check them.

We are prey animals after all. And we want to go parading ourselves in front of a hungry predator which to me is extremely unwise. We put ourselves under undo risk. Why should those animals fear or respect us? We pass laws so that they can't be hunted, and we expect them to thank us for it? Welcome to the real world. Predatory animals are not just animals, they are machines programmed to eat, sleep, and produce other little eating machines.

When you are a predator you eat the easiest things you can find, a'la humans. We have to start respecting the animals and not just kill them off. We as humans above all need to know our place as one of god’s creations. We are a steward of this earth and we need to protect and preserve it. Sometimes you have to cull things out. This earth doesn't belong solely to us......we hold it in trust for those who follow. The Great White Shark has a place on earth; I just wish it was not near the beach I swim at. We can not just go out and destroy every predatory animal that we believe is “useless”. We have to learn to live with them and learn that humans are not the only species on earth.

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Technology is not always for the better.

I had believed that technology would always make our lives better. I gave that statement a long hard look over the past few days and it is so far from the truth. I have done well for myself and my family because of advances in technology, but sometimes these advancements just are not worth it.

Does anyone remember calling up customer service and getting a live person on the phone? I have screamed, “get me a representative”, into the phone so many times only to hear, “please press one or two or three for this or that”. I want to speak to a live representative and ask my question. My god, I have a PhD and I cannot figure out a phone tree, imagine how much trouble our grandparents have.

I love my blackberry more than any device in the world. I enjoy instant e-mails and surfing the web from almost everywhere. I do not like all of the other extras that come on it though. Music videos and GPS programs are all just a drain on the battery. Why make it so complicated when it worked well before.

How many buttons does a television remote need? I do not know what half of the buttons do on my Direct Television remote. I have lost the programming several times and have always spent hours getting it reprogrammed. I want to turn on the television with my remote and watch my program.

Toasters are not even toasters anymore. There used to be light, medium and dark settings and now there are buttons that have buttons. With all of these settings I cannot get my bagel just right any more. I want to keep my toaster as simple as possible.

I spent over an hour trying to pop the hood of my BMW a few weeks ago. The books for new vehicles are now the size of a city phone book. Why are there so many useless options in a car now? The voice recognition software takes so much time that it is faster to do everything manually. Try changing your headlight yourself nowadays.

Computer operating systems do more than needed for the average home user. Since Windows 95 came out replacing Windows 3.11, there have been so many changes to the family PC that I have lost track. Most home users want e-mail and an easy way to surf the World Wide Web. I guess I am tired of answering everyone’s computer questions so maybe this complaint is a little skewed.

What happened to waiting in line at the deli with a simple ticket in hand? There are so many gadgets in the store that it is more than a hindrance than a help. Keep it simple people, please.

It took me three months to figure out how to use my new washer and dryer. The first time I used the washing machine; the drum did not fill up with water. I almost called the store to return it until I read in the manual that you don’t need a full drum of water to clean your clothes. I am still trying to figure that one out.

I installed a ceiling fan back in the winter and the fan had more settings than the computer operating system I just complained about. Plus, the remote was worse than my Direct Television remote. It is a ceiling fan, it should not try to make toast.

Advancement in technology is a wonderful thing and it has so many uses in our everyday lives. Making things overly complicated instead of keeping it simple is only going to make things regress. I still go into a bank instead of using an ATM machine. I do not buy anything online because I love to actually see in person what I am buying. I like a real fire in my fireplace instead of a gas burning fake one. I enjoy the simple and I will never enjoy complicated. Sounds crazy from a technical engineer, eh?




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Cancer is in our lives, let’s get it out of it.

Cancer has touched the lives of every American at least once. Even if no one has cancer in your family everyone knows someone who has either had it or has it. Millions of Americans battle some type of cancer every day. There are over one hundred known forms of cancer and that list continues to grow. While survival rates have started in a positive direction there is so much work that still needs to be done.

I have been hit incredibly hard by cancer over the last few years. Believe me it is a heart wrenching experience to go through because you care so much, but it is also so very selfish on our part to be the one’s complaining. This is not about our feelings; it is about the person waging this battle. Recently, my mother and my best friend started to wage a battle with this terrible disease. I never realized how much intestinal fortitude they have as they each go through this. Trust me it is not just a battle it is a war.

My mother has to be the strongest person I have ever met. Day after day and hospital stay after hospital stay my mother endures some of the longest days you could ever imagine. She never complains, never tells us how hard it is, and never gives you a reason to be sad for her. I would give all that I have so she would be cured of this terrible disease. You can hope and pray every day that today is the day she wakes up and she is completely cured. That day is not going to come right now because there is no cure as of yet for her type of cancer. We just have to be there and be loving, supportive, and try to be as half as strong as she is. My mom just finished going through chemo and radiation on the same day and not one time did her smile leave her face. Truly a remarkable woman and an even more remarkable mother.

Somehow those petty little things my mom and I bickered about all these years are certainly not that important anymore are they? Neither does all of the times my mother told me what to do and gave me advice I did not want to hear. Mom whatever you say is fine with me.

I was listening to a telethon last week for the Dana Farber Cancer Institute and a thirteen year old boy was speaking about his own personal battle with cancer. This amazing young man told the host on the radio that the main reason he fights so hard is because he knows his mother and father are not strong enough to go on without him. My god, thirteen year olds should be worried about their first kiss or a baseball game after school and not whether their parents are strong enough to be without him. This young man is an inspiration to all.

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) is the division of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services charged with making sure that drugs and biologics are safe and effective before they go on the market. Unfortunately, this is a very slow process and I believe most people would like get this process moving by cutting some of that red tape. Time and time again drugs that could save patients do not get to them because of the long approval process. While the FDA tries its best as they do their due diligence. The approval process needs to become much more effective to help some folks much quicker.

Research costs billions of dollars every year. The government spends about five billion dollars a year on cancer research. I am a proponent of government controls on spending but I certainly believe that as long as the five billion dollars is well spent then I wish we gave another five billion dollars. Cancer Research receives another five billion dollars a year from private sources as well. There is plenty of waste that goes on and there are plenty of critics on how to spend the research money however, all and all the money is going to a great cause.

There are plenty of success stories that will bring a tear to your eye and make you believe that someday cancer will be a thing of the past. Until it is a thing of the past , we must all band together and help in the fight to put the word cancer in our distant memory. Go out and buy that pink ribbon, ride that bicycle to raise money, or drop that spare change into that jar in the supermarket. Cancer is in our lives, let’s get it out of it.

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Weekly Thought Bonanza

On Sunday (or Monday if there is a holiday) I produce a column called “The Weekly Thought Bonanza”. The premise of this column is about the random thoughts that run through my head all week and trust me there are a plethora of them. I will try to share as many of these thoughts as I can so each one of my readers can think just a little bit extra over the weekend.

It always amazes me how people can be so rude and inconsiderate all of the time. Earlier in the week, I watched two elderly gentlemen trying to cross the street and at least fifteen cars did not let them cross in a crosswalk no less. What is everyone’s hurry, seriously?

There is something magical to me when the leaves turn colors in autumn here in New England. It also signifies the start to football, baked apple pies, fires in the fireplace or woodstove, autumn brew beer, etc. To me Autumn is a more of a beginning than the Spring. I Love the fall.

How many weight loss pills are on the market today? As Americans we have the worst eating habits in the world, yet all you have to do is take a magic pill or drink a special shake and all the weight goes away. Take a walk in your local park and see how well those pills and shakes actually work.

Hollywood rehab shows are not on television. Why would anyone and I mean anyone watch one of these shows?

Who is Lauren Conrad and why should I care about her?

Last year I closed my pool at the end of October. This year I am closing it this week. I believe I used the pool no more than ten times since April. Good old fashion global warming.

Beverly Hills 90210 came back last year and on Tuesday night another retread is coming back, Melrose Place. Ok, I admit I will be watching it on Tuesday night. I will do anything to go back to those college years.
Why did the Patriots trade Richard Seymour?

My beloved New York Yankees look better to me every day. Since I was traded to the Yankees, I never realized just how miserable Red Sox fans are. I have people calling and e-mailing me still complaining about my move. Most of these e-mails and calls come from people who have not watched a game since the last time the Red Sox won in ’07. Just because you live in Massachusetts does not mean you have to be all Red Sox all the time. I love the controversy though. Let’s go Yankees!!

And “The Weekly Thought Bonanza” thought of the week; Has anyone ever remembered the last time the flu has scared everyone so badly? H1N1 is the flu people it is not the Bubonic Plague.


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